Daddy or chips ? Decisions, decisions !

Remember that advert for McCain chips ? The one were the little girl is asked “what do you like best, Daddy or chips ?” What a choice! What a decision for a hungry girl to make! In the end the decision appears to be an easy one for her, chips all the way! Sometimes decisions are simple ones; which cocktail to have, do I order in take out or make dinner myself. Not necessarily earth shattering but what may not be important to you may be vastly important to others.

I guess there comes a time in all our lives when we are faced with life changing decisions. We have to take out our road map of life and decide which route is best. Do you listen to your sat nav, follow instructions and take the most obvious route with no diversions or chuck the damn thing out the window and go down the country roads with lots of twists and turns?  The motorway route would be straight, easy driving with the odd jam but the country route may take us down unknown minor roads providing interesting driving challenges with many gear changes and the risk of hazards. It is not easy and whatever path we take there will always be a back seat driver who will tell you that you should have gone the other route. Life changing decisions, like they way we travel, are very personal and unless we have travelled in someone elses shoes, we should not judge their ‘driving style’ but support them in their decision no matter how hard it can be.

During the week a friend asked, what is more important ? Work or Love ? Danger ! Minefield! Whatever answer you give to this will be wrong in others eyes. In my opinion, the answer is not simple but you have to think when you do reply, did I answer with my heart or my head? The question reminded me of Charlotte who, six years ago, had to make a choice. Did she give up her life in Glasgow, cracking job, gorgeous West End flat and close friends to move to the Middle East to be with her boyfriend of 5 years? Jack had been offered a long-term contract, earning mega bucks with an oil firm and he wanted Charlotte to move out there to be with him. Up till now, they had enjoyed the best of both worlds in Glasgow and the Middle East but now this short-term arrangement would be no more and one of them was going to have to make a huge decision. On paper the Middle East option was a no brainer fab house, luxury lifestyle, financial security for them both, but for Charlotte the decision to be with the man she loved was proving to be not quite as simple. Poor soul was literally torn in two, her heart screaming go but her head saying what if you give everything up, go live in the sun and you are bored rigid? What if love is not enough? Charlotte decided that she was thinking far too much and went with her heart. A quick sale of her flat, two weeks notice and huge party to say goodbye to her friends, Charlotte was lying in the sun beside her own pool. Six weeks later after never seeing Jack till late at night because of his work commitments and schmoozing of clients, her cases were packed and she was heading home. It turned out the Jack she thought she knew was very different from the Jack that lived and worked in the Middle East. Charlotte came home to her family and friends, not one of whom uttered the told you so phrase till she said it herself.

It just goes to show that any change of direction in life is not easy and most definitely not simple. There will be regrets, there will be heartache but as a friend our job is to stand by them, hold their hand, buy the conciliatory drink, say there there and keep your opinions to yourself … for now!

So if you choose the more difficult country route you may just get a better view or get stuck behind a tractor. If you take the motorway you may end up in a rut driving down monotonous, boring, straight roads or you may just get to your destination quicker. Whatever life route you decide to take, learn from your decision and remember you can always do a U-turn, as long as it is legal of course !

Gx

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